The National Addiction Memorial honors the loved ones we’ve lost.

Alec was my firstborn and my shining light. Always smiling and laughing. He was really smart, eager to learn and try new things. He loved sports, especially the San Francisco 49ers and the NY Mets. As he grew he developed a passion for comedy and music, attending concerts as often as he could. In fact, at the time of his death, he was working security at the Capital Theatre, where he could make some money while indulging in his appetite for music. He struggled on and off with addiction, starting out with pills and progressing into heroin. I was unaware of his addiction until about three years prior to his death. He was hospitalized twice and engaged in some outpatient treatment. Alec didn’t like to talk much about his struggles. I’m sure part of it was to protect me but I think he also felt shame from the stigma. He would do well, and then have relapses. The last relapse took his life. The last time I saw him before his death was at my daughter's college graduation party. He looked amazing. He was with his girlfriend of two years, and they seemed happy. He informed me he was applying to go back to college. I couldn’t be happier until my world came crashing down shortly after. It’s a phone call I pray no other parent ever has to get. I would get so angry with him when he was in active addiction, but now I’ve educated myself to see how this is a disease. My son didn’t want to be an addict, it was just too big for him to get a grip on. I think about him every second of every day. We all miss him tremendously.

Callan was a wonderful son. His loving soul was high-jacked after knee surgeries nine years ago.  He knew he was loved, and we were worried about him.  After rehab he did pretty well, mostly, only compromised when visiting his "friends", who we warned him repeatedly to avoid.  These were not his friends, but profiteers from Callan's addiction and trust.  The drugs changed him and although we'd see glimpses of the the old Callan, he was suffering and conflicted with pain and guilt, and never the same.  He was 31 years old when he OD'd.

Despite this overwhelming struggle, Callan excelled at work and strove to keep in touch with us on a regular, if not daily, basis.  His concern for all of us, and for others, is well documented with stories that make us even more proud of him. 

Callan loved sports, especially Pittsburgh teams, with the Steelers being his #1 team.  He loved going to Nashville Predator games and traveling with the love of his life, Kacy.  Being married to Kacy, we feel, was a great blessing for our family and gave us 2 or 3 years with Callan we may not have had.  He enjoyed regular workouts with his younger brother Ethan, and was an exceptionally strong weight lifter.  His concern for his younger sister Rachel, still in high school, was a topic of almost every conversation.

It will be hard to watch Steeler games, or do other normal things we did together.  Our hearts are broken and we all have a huge hole in our lives that cannot be filled.

My brother was a realist who saw everyone for who they were. Addict or not, he saw the very best in you, no matter what. At a young age, my brother and I would spend so much time together, going on camping trips, to the beach, just living life. We always stayed connected even when he moved to Jersey a couple of times. I never knew anything about addiction until we both watched my sister go through a horrible heroin addiction--in and out of many rehabs, letters--we watched and were a part of it all. Except there was one thing I didn't know about my brother....I didnt' know that he was addicted to heroin. Joey and I got into our fair share of trouble but we were thick as thieves. We were always together. He used to live in Downingtown and that's when I first tried coke. We stayed up for hours talking about life and so much more. He may have had an addiction way before any of us finally figured it out. He loved his family and friends. Being around a lot of people at one time was his thing. He wanted to be around as many people as possible and now I understand why. Whenever we would hang out, we would take some pills, do a couple lines of coke and drink a little but I never thought anything of it. He was the most caring person I've ever known in my life. He made a huge impact on everyone he came into contact with. He was a huge player, and looooooved the ladies, but when he was actually in love, he loved hard. There was a period of time where he and I lost contact, but I'll never forget the night he called me just to talk. He went to a bar in one night and someone accused him of harming a female. If you knew my brother and everything he stood for, you would know that what he was accused of wasn't right at all. He was a firm believer of hit first ask questions later, and that's what he did. He called me and told me that someone was accusing him and he didn't like it. He had enough and beat the guy saying all of this rude, disrespectful stuff to him. Then, he said I can't do this anymore. I wish I would've been more attentive to what he meant instead of just agreeing. The next day he came over and I could tell he was different by the way he stood there with the blank stare, not talking, trying to make jokes but it was directed at his own pain. I was watching someone I loved so much die right in front of me. I'm not sure when his addiction started, and my sister believes and carries the weight of believing that she was the one who caused him to become addicted to heroin. It could've started when he was in the hospital for a number of things, broken bones, liver problems, or it could've started in 2009 when our grandfather took his last breath. But I didn't help. You see, I was an addict myself, except my drug of choice was crystal meth. I didn't care about anyone but myself and how I was going to get my next fix. But I was dating the dealer so I stopped worrying, and I started thinking about how much I needed to get me through the rest of the day and how much I needed for the next day. I was already a mother of two, heavy meth addiction, toxic/abusive relationship. But Joey was always there for me. He was my protector, my safe zone, my go-to guy, he was me. Joey had a contagious smile and laugh, and pure happiness, joy, and love expelled from him. It was to hard to ignore. He was the life of the party, and there was never a dull moment with Joe. I was five years into a really toxic relationship, and the person I thought I was going to spend my life with took a turn for the worse. I was mentally, emotionally, and verbally abused for majority of our relationship, but Joey was always there to lift me up even if he didn't know the real reason behind my pain, even while he was drowning himself. I'll never forget the day I was told that he passed. It still haunts me to this day. I was pregnant with my third child, it was 21 days after his birthday. I was still in my active addiction. I was coming back from a doctor's appointment at the ob when my mom called me and said she had something to tell me and that I needed to get there right away. Taking a step back, my parents got divorced shortly after my 21st birthday and Joey was still alive but we never spoke. When I showed up to my moms house, both my mother and my father were on the porch waiting for me. They did that stupid look that parents do when they have something important to say but no one wants to say it. They looked at each other and I was pissed off cause well I needed my drugs and I didn't care what they had to say, so I shouted to spit it out! I'll never forget this. I watched tears well up in my father's eyes. He looked at my mom and then they said what I was hoping to never hear. Joey passed away this morning. He was found alone, blue, not breathing for sometime. My brother died of an overdose, alone. I dropped to my knees and cried like a baby, and then I ran. It's been almost three years since he's passed and I still haven't accepted it and I don't think I really ever will. My brother meant everything to me and life is not the same anymore. But because of his death and this disease, I am two years sober. I made the decision to better myself and my life for me, for my kids, and for my family. Joey, today I am sober because of you. Today I can share my experience, strength, and hope with other people. It's because of you that I love everyone a little bit harder, and it's because of you that I can make people smile even when I'm struggling. It's because of you I learned how to be selfless and more caring to those around me. You've taught me so much as life went on and I carry those things with me for the rest of my life. You were an amazing person, a wonderful brother, grandchild, father, nephew, and uncle. You were the light everyone was proud to be around. I miss you big brother, and thank you for touching so many lives. Your memory lives on. I wish I would've been able to say goodbye. You were the life of the party and this party is dull now. Truly missed and loved, and damn sure never forgotten. Live free 🖤

Jared was a loving, caring young man who was taken from us much too early. In his short time on this earth, he touched so many people with his kindness and his warm smile. He will be missed and never forgotten. May he rest in peace.

My son struggled with addiction for 4 years. His twin brother, unfortunately, is presently fighting the same addiction. We, as a family, have suffered a huge loss. Deni was a pure and good soul. Even though his addiction consumed him, he never stopped fighting his demons. People say addiction changes, but Deni stayed himself. He was loved and appreciated, respected and cherished. His funeral truly tells who he was, what he stood for... There were hundreds of people, all coming to say "the world is not going to be the same without you Deni!"
He left a mark in this world, even though he only lived for 23 short years. We, as a family celebrate his memory, his legacy and unconditional love Deni always had for us... He wouldn't have it any other way!

Matthew was a very kind, caring person. He made friends where ever he went. He was always helping others, especially his students! He loved being a teacher and working with middle school kids. He is missed by so many, he will always be forever in our hearts. 💕

Patrick was an amazing man. His opioid addiction didn't change this. He was lighthearted, funny, and sweet. He loved his daughter. He loved life. He had so much more to live for, but now we live for him. He was a week shy of his 30th birthday and was home a short month from a successful program in a halfway house. I loved Patrick more than anything. He was my person, my best friend, and the love of my life. We miss his laugh and his animated personality. There aren't enough words to describe the loss we have suffered. I could go on and on about him. His daughter and I carry him with us always.

Alex was such an amazing and genuine person. He was extremely passionate, caring, supportive, and loving. He was my other half, my soul mate, my best friend. I always told him the only time I truly felt the feeling of being at home was whenever I was with him. Without him it feels like my house burned to the ground, and there is nothing left. He was such a prankster. He loved doing/saying things he knew would shock people. He loved video games and music, especially rap. He was working on some of his own music before he passed. He was always there for the people he cared about no matter what. Unfortunately, he struggled with so many demons that he just couldn’t shake. He struggled with anxiety, depression, bipolar, and addiction. Losing him has been so hard, but he is no longer struggling everyday and he is finally at peace. While the world lost a spectacular individual, heaven gained one heck of an angel.

I love and miss my Penguin more than anything.

My Kristopher
Kindhearted, funny, extremely knowledgeable, and very humble. He is missed by his family and friends💔 He tried so hard to get and stay sober, and he set timelines and goals that he managed to achieve on his own. After three months sober, we lost him to fentanyl poisoning. The system failed him for so many times, 30 days in and out of treatment, left to sink or swim. The stigma stopped him from reaching out to the people that loved him.
A life gone too soon, please not one more life💔

My dad was compassionate and loyal. He went out of his way to do things to make our days a little easier, like waking up early to make sure we got breakfast, or warming the cars up in the morning before we’d have to leave during the cold Wisconsin winter. He was a good cook and always made sure to bake us our favorite cakes and a special dinner for our birthdays. My love of cooking comes from him.

My dad was smart and funny. He rarely went anywhere without a book in hand, and could quote movies and TV shows of all different genres. My love of The Princess Bride, Scrubs, and many other things I haven’t been able to watch since his passing come from him.

My dad was a hard worker. Many of my childhood memories are of my mom, my dad, and I going out to my grandma’s house, where we would help take care of her old farmhouse and the land around it. Even when he didn’t live with us, he still came by and did housework so that things looked nice for when we got home.

My dad was a myriad of wonderful things that brought joy and happiness to those around him, but he was also an alcoholic. He started drinking at a young age, and never stopped. Through my birth, a divorce because of his alcoholism, a remarriage to the same woman who never wanted to leave in the first place, the birth of his second daughter, and the threat of another divorce. Through all of these periods of great happiness, and the deepest sorrows that stemmed from his drinking, he never could stop.

My dad could not stop drinking even after he was hospitalized and they told him that if he didn’t stop, he would die. It only took three months after his release from the hospital for his body to give up in his sleep. He was exactly one week away from his 45th birthday.

My dad was an old soul, but with all of his wisdom he couldn’t keep the demons that were haunting him at bay. Between his disease and his learned habits, he could not let all of the love that we had for him replace the bottle. I think about him every day and hope that his soul is finally at rest.

My brother struggled most of his life, starting with alcohol at 14 years of age and ending his life with prescription meds. We miss that beautiful smile, but we know that he’s finally at peace.

Christian had a sweet, gentle spirit. He tried many times to get and stay sober, but never found enough peace to maintain his recovery. Christian was 21 when he died and the world lost a beautiful person. I'm still sad.

Matthew was the most loving, outgoing, caring, empathetic person you could meet. He had friends from all over world. He would walk into a room and become the life of the party, befriending everyone that came into his path. He was soulful and loved adventure and travel. He loved taking his guitar everywhere and entertaining a group or just sitting on a beach and playing for his friends. His favorite song was "Wonderwall" by Oasis. He loved studying different cultures and knew how to bring people together. No one ever felt left out. He was all inclusive and it didn't matter who you were or from where you came. He also loved his family and always looked forward to spending time with everyone over the holidays and summers.

Growing up, Matthew was always high energy and never slept. Even as a baby he was always wide awake and needing to be up and out of his bed and held. He loved and needed attention always (not in a bad way) but he just wanted to be loved and he gave love back. When he was in school he was very active and an amazing student. Because of his high energy we had him tested for ADD and a very detailed IQ test that took a few months to complete. They found that he did not have ADD and that he scored in the superior range of IQ for his age, which may be why he just needed to always be challenged. His mind was alway on.

Matthew got addicted to pain killers after a few minor surgeries (tonsils removed, adenoids removed, deviated septum, appendix, hernia). He also had issues after hurting himself wrestling in high school, complained about minor pain in his back and neck. His doctors especially once at ASU easily prescribed different medications to him in large amounts (painkillers and xanex). Once back in school, he continued to get prescribed meds basically for anything he needed. It seems like a few of his fraternity brothers at ASU did this together because a couple have passed within the same time. I think one of the biggest reasons he got hooked was that he felt it helped knock him out (as he said) so he could get some sleep. He used to be up for days if he didn't with his mind on. This is how he started self medicating. As his tolerance grew to the meds so did the amount, which then led to him (trying) using heroin by the time he was a senior. We only found out during his senior year. He was a normal college student. He didn't seem any different from any of the other kids we knew. If anything he was happy, outgoing, fun and smart. There where no signs that said I"M AN ADDICT (or maybe there were and we just didn't know) but once we knew that he was taking prescription meds, we put him directly into a rehab center for a month, then a step down from there into a sober living. We still had no clue he was doing anything more than that, until he was in rehab and he had to come clean during family week. Once home he was fine but struggled over the next few years and ended up back in detox a few times. He really wanted to just be ok and normal like any 24 yr old. After several months, we finally thought he was good. He was sober for some time and he wanted to finish up school and take classes in LA for film. We agreed to this if he continued with an outpatient program with therapy and lived in a sober living house to make us feel comfortable with his being away. Unfortunately, it only took one more mistake after being there for six months. Matthew passed from an accidental overdose on June 12, 2016, 12 days after his 25th birthday. I never read the toxicology report to know if it was tainted with fentanyl or just too much. At the end, it just doesn't matter. Addiction took him from us and the world. He is forever in the hearts of so many people who's lives he's touched and saved. He's missed every moment of everyday and his life will continue in the memories he's left us all with. Love, Mom

I miss you Penguin. I love you.

My beloved son Jeremy died of a heroin overdose that was laced with fentanyl on March 25, 2016 at the young age of 23. His struggle with addiction started in his teens with marijuana. Until he was 20 yrs old, marijuana was usually the only drug he used. After that, he started trying different drugs and got addicted to opioids, which led to heroin. He had been in recovery for three months, going to meetings and counseling, attending church and working. It was so shocking because Jeremy seemed to be turning his life around.
Jeremy grew up in a loving family with three brothers. He played baseball for eight years. He enjoyed a variety of music, loved the group Kiss, and played the drums. He had so many friends and was loved by all who knew him. I miss my son so much and my heart is forever broken. I love you Jeremy! ❤️

April had struggled for more than 15 years. In the past three years her addiction escalated to to highest level possible. Her struggle of mental illness and addiction was always present. Being a nurse and her Mom, I was always trying to fix her and get her help. Somehow she always bounced back. Through the use of outpatient, in patient, expensive out of state programs, and DBT therapy, I always looked for the golden ticket. Her struggles in the last three years led her down the path of no return. Every horrible thing from incarceration to living on the streets happened. We were able to spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with her for the first time in three years in 2018. As she was waiting to get into a recovery home, she stayed with her father, near all of us. April's drug of choice was not heroin but it became it for the first time in 15 years. Her death was an accidental overdose. Her struggles are no longer but I miss her every minute of my life. She is finally at peace at the age of 32 years old. April was the most kind, artistic, giving, and religious soul. We fought so hard over the years. April has family that love and miss her beyond words. April loved making jewelry and painting. She was always making something and giving gifts to everyone. I cherish these...her Mom

David's drug and alcohol use caused him to aspirate in his sleep, which caused a traumatic brain injury. He was in a coma for several weeks with his family around him and in deep despair. It was thought that, if he even lived, he would be in a vegetative state. As time went by, David got stronger but he lost the use of his legs and needed wheelchair assistance. He eventually went back to high school after missing the last half of 2001 and first half of the beginning of the next year and he graduated with excellent grades!

As time went by, he quit his counseling sessions and his drug addiction creeped back in. He Googled pain info to tell the doctor what types of pain he was having so he could get prescriptions. That was the end of David as I knew him. Google searches, rare diseases, more prescriptions, and when he ran out, he went to the streets and got heroine. Over the next few years, David overdosed no less than seven times and each time the nurses and doctors worked to save his life. He even went to rehab for a couple weeks to prove to everyone he could quit.

Then he hit the jackpot! A nice doctor that would just hand him prescriptions to get him off his back and make a little extra cash. And then he overdosed for the last time. That's the day his family also died a little bit inside and a Mother that still cries and can't seem to get back to normal.

Blake was born in New Haven, CT and grew up in Trumbull, CT. From an early age, he delighted his family and friends with his silly humor and beautiful, infectious smile. It was clear, early on, that Blake had incredible musical talent. He mastered the guitar and taught himself to play the piano and use the electrical equipment to mix his musical compositions. He hoped one day to write, record, and perform his songs. Blake loved to travel, visiting Africa, Thailand, and Germany. He had a love for all animals, and they, in turn, were drawn to his gentle demeanor. He also enjoyed swimming, ice hockey, snowboarding, and skateboarding but always returned to his first love — writing and performing music. More than anything, though, Blake will be remembered for his love and compassion for his family and friends.

Those who knew Blake, even just a little, lost a shining light in their lives. Blake had so much goodness and such a capacity to bring happiness and laughter to others. The earth is a dimmer place without him. We are heartbroken, but comforted that our memory of his larger than life personality, beautiful heart, and soulful songs will be treasured forever.

My brother lost his life to his addiction this month four years ago. He was so talented and funny but he could not see past his pain and he tried to mask it with alcohol and drugs. He is so missed and there are so many times I want to pick up the phone and speak to him. He started using very young and it affected him the rest of his life. He battled this disorder all his life. He is loved and missed and not forgotten.